Woman demands sister invites her fiancé to her small wedding, despite only dating him for a few months, sister refuses to invite a practical stranger: ‘I barely know him'

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Feb 18, 2025 8:00 PM EST

How far would you go to make someone else happy at your expense?

Different people go for different distances to make others happy. Some would completely disregard their own feeling just so they could please others (we call them… people pleasers), while others strictly put themselves first no matter what they are being asked to do for others (we call them… narcissists?) 

Most people are somewhere in the middle. While they try to keep their loved ones happy, they still have red lines they would not cross no matter what.

For many brides, their wedding is a line they refuse to cross. They want that day to be as perfect as possible, and they are not willing to give up on anything for other people. It's their day, and they would not settle on it. No bride should give up on her happiness for someone else's.

That is the source of the conflict between the two sisters in the story below. One sister is getting married, while the other decided to make demands that do not sit well with the bride…

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  • "I feel uncomfortable inviting people I don't know to my wedding"
    via omelnytskyi

  • "AITAH for not inviting my sister’s fiancé and his kids to our wedding"

    My fiancé (M, 27) and I (F, 27) are planning a small wedding. We only invited immediate family and close friends so we can afford to pay for the wedding
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • ourselves. We also said that guests can only bring a plus- one if they've been dating for at least a year because we can't afford to pay for someone they barely know.
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • Here's the issue. My sister is 25 and started dating Jon in November. He's 43 and has two teenagers. Three weeks ago, they announced they were engaged. I've tried talking to her a few times
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • about how he's too old for her and how she's way too young to be a stepmom to two teens, but she told me to mind my own business and that she loves him.
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • For our wedding, I only invited my sister. She called and asked why Jon and his kids weren't invited. I told her it's because I barely know them and they haven't even been dating for a year.
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • She said Jon is family now and that his kids will be my niece and nephews, so it's different. I told her I can't afford to pay for three extra guests who are basically
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • strangers to us. Now she's mad and says she won't come either. My parents get where I'm coming from, but they also want my sister at the
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  • wedding. My dad even offered to cover the cost of Jon and the kids. But the thing is, I just don't want them there. I feel uncomfortable inviting
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  • people I don't know to my wedding. Am I being a stubborn a h le? PS: we only have 24 guests in total. She wanna add 3 strangers to it now
    via Mindless-Island-8929

  • Should the bride give up on her dream wedding to keep her sister happy? Or should the sister back off and realize that she is asking too much of the bride?

    Is this conflict even about the wedding, or is the bride only using it as an excuse to show her disapproval of her sister's rapid engagement?

    Scroll down to read the comments and find out what other people think of this dispute.

  • toosheeptheorist NTA all the other - objections aside, you don't have to invite anyone to your wedding that you don't want there. You and your fiance are paying for everything yourself and
    via toosheeptheorist
  • keeping it small and intimate. Although it is very generous of your father to offer to pay for your sister's new boyfriend and kids to come, it means nothing if you don't want them there.
    via toosheeptheorist
  • Your sister also fails to realize that invitations are not court summons - she does not have to be there. Eventually, your sister will (hopefully) get her head out of her and discover for
    via toosheeptheorist
  • herself what a mistake she is making. Until then, stand your ground and keep your wedding the way that you want it.
    via toosheeptheorist
  • Mr&Mrs J Smith Request the company of at the marriage of their daughter Sarah to Mr. James Jones on Saturday 15th Aug 20 at Arch
    via wragg
  • Frankensteins_Kid ΝΤΑ Even without your "judgement" about Jon, you and your fiancé set the rules for ALL the guests' plus- ones to be dating for at least a year. So it's not a
    via Frankensteins_Kid
  • personal attack against Jon. Do Jon & his kids even want to come to the wedding? Or is your sister just trying to force you to accept her "fiancé"?
    via Frankensteins_Kid
  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP I don't know. I never talked to them. I met them 3 times in total
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • PhotographUnknown Your wedding but how would you feel if your fiance weren't invited to a family affair?
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  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP I wouldn't be even introducing him to my parents that early let alone get engaged!
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • PhotographUnknown Not the question I'm asking though.
    via PhotographUnknown
  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP If I was only dating my fiancé for a few months I wouldn't be expecting him to be included in any family events
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • Brilliant Piglet2093 You are trying to control your sister. You are the a h le. 100%, but not for not inviting your sister's fiance to your wedding. Quit trying to control your sister and tell her who she should and shouldn't date. If she wants to date an older man. That's her choice.
    via Brilliant_Piglet2093
  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP I'm not controlling her but I control who can be at our wedding.
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • Frankensteins_Kid Never even talked to them?! Oof yeah those guys are basically strangers to you. I wouldn't want strangers at my small intimate wedding either
    via Frankensteins_Kid
  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP No! I saw them for the first time at Christmas dinner then at my parents' place two more times after
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • Original Archer5984 Ask your sister how many strangers you're allowed to invite her wedding?
    via Original_Archer5984
  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP She doesn't see them as strangers at my wedding. "He is my future hands and his kids will be your niece and nephew”
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • tiger0204 How many other people are coming but aren't allowed to bring their significant other? There should be others if you didn't make the one year rule specifically to spite your sister.
    via tiger0204
  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP My fiancé's brother is not bringing his gf of 6 months. He didn't even argue
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • hdeskins Info: when is your wedding? If it's in the next couple of weeks, it may be too soon to change anyways. But if it's months away, you do have time to get to know them
    via hdeskins
  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP April
    via Mindless-Island-8929
  • briomio Why would teenagers want to spend their afternoon going to a wedding where they will know no one - your sister is being ridiculous and yes the fiance is too old for her being as she could also be his daughter.
    via briomio
  • Mindless-Island-8929 OP I'm pretty sure they don't! My sister is probably forcing them to
    via Mindless-Island-8929

Tags

aita bride groom drama wedding planning mother Wedding Invitation sisters siblings wife reddit story petty husband wedding family sister fiancé Reddit
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